Bio
Latest
This Year
Last Year
Older
Music
Links
Profile
Notes
E-Mail
Diaryland
Cute history boys 2004-03-01 @ 6:42 p.m.
Have I mentioned that my Intolerance in Europe class is filled with smart and cute guys? Add to this an eccentric but wonderful professor, and I'm enjoying that class immensely, even if I am somewhat behind on the readings.
James sits in the front row of class next to me. We usually have the row to ourselves, but sometimes the car-whiz guy whose name I can't remember but who apparently believes in modern-day interpretations of Nostradamus sits with us. James is a freshman, the only one in our class apparently (which makes sense given its an upper-division class). He has pretty blue eyes, soft skin, and really cool brown hair - it looks kind of like a spray of water, only at the same time it doesn't appear unkempt in any way. He's very nice, and his clothing is just tight enough to profile his body in this amazing way. Ah, what a distraction when you're trying to concentrate!
Sam sits toward the back of the room. I think I may have met him before at that one Hillel meeting I went to a few months ago. He has those dark, good looking Jewish features - big nose included, but it suits him. He hangs out at Northlight Books fairly often, and once or twice I've studied there in hopes I might see him. This is all Baruch's fault, because we were checking him out during Biglass' Coffee Night one Thursday, and Baruch thought I should hit on him.
"What makes you so sure he's gay?" I asked.
"No straight man wears a shirt like that!" he retorted.
"Well, maybe he just likes to show off those incredible arms of his?"
Baruch just chuckled, but I can't be certain. To complicate things, Sam is a really friendly guy and he says hi to me whenever he sees me. I've had some small tallk with him before, but it was just about school stuff. Ah... I hate mixed signals. But its not like I can just ask him if he's gay, can I? No matter how you phrase the question, I think a straight guy is inevitably offended when you ask that, because either A)You've just emasculated them, and/or B) They take offense for you trying to hit on them. But even if he didn't beat the crap out of me for wondering (and I doubt Sam's that kind of guy), I don't want to hurt his feelings. What do you think I should do?
Scott is the other guy I'll tell you about. He's of Polish ancestry - I thought he looked more Germanic, but I can see it. He has brown eyes and flushed, reddish skin - very smooth. He's very intelligent and we've had some great converstations about historical stuff. I hope he's not jealous of me though because I got an A on my paper and he worked harder on his and only got a B. He read mine and told me it was good though, and I used the classic out of "I don't know if I really deserved it". But after that, we had another really cool talk, in which he threw more for a little loop. He was talking about how he was Catholic but kind of a minimalist as far as religious duties. He was telling me about a sermon he had sat through recently about the sanctity of marriage and the evil homosexuals, and my heart flies up and my stomach goes acid as it always does when I'm bracing myself for homophobia. Then in the next sentence, he tells me he's cool with gays and he's a real live and let live guy, so I relax. I think he even said more than once in oure conversation that he was cool with gay guys, which brings up 3 interesting possibilites:
1) It was a coincidence
2) He knows I'm gay and wanted to make me feel comfortable
3) He's gay and wanted to speak out against homophobia!
Or of course 4) I'm just reading too much into this and need to get a life. But, wonder of wonders, I got up the courage to ask him out for a drink! We exchanged phone numbers and it was so great! I grinned all the way back to my dorm.
I'm finally starting to feel more comfortable with straight guys! My counselor was right; just change perspectives and it really does make a difference. Not that I still don't have a bunch of insecurity around guys in general, but its getting better. I'm even having decent conversation with Aaron now! Casey still kind of shrugs me off, but maybe he is just a jerk and I should get over it. You can't be everyone's friend, but you can be cordial, and I thank the LORD that things are getting nice around here again.
Adios for now!
"Details in the Fabric" - May 31, 2009
Not So Quick Questions - April 6, 2009
The Morning Stars - Lords of the 15 - April 9, 2009
Sincerity and Faith in Magic - April 10, 2009
Not So Quick Questions (2) - April 14, 2009
|
CURRENT MOON moon phase |
