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Diaryland
Better Safe Then Sorry September 30, 2005 @ 6:17 a.m.
Loralea and I are not going to the conference. We stayed up half the night deciding, and pretty much agreed. It seems so out of the blue, but after talking to each other for awhile and meditating, strong signs that both of us have been getting over the last week all added up to something signficant.
For me, it was the Tower, and the void of course moon the travel and conference would start on, and the feeling I got yesterday and a few days prior when I talked to my family like I was saying goodbye to them for a long time. I always have melodrama and delusions of fantasy and grandeur going on in my head, but when normal fears seem to stick especially hard for no apparent reason, I know something deeper is going on.
For Loralea, its been much stronger, given she's received more illumination than I have. She has been unable to pack for the trip for several days. Her consciousness is scattered. She has a terrible feeling of weight, anxiety and dread surrounding her. And many more little signs for both of us added up.
After I wrote last night's entry, I told her:
"Loralea, I have to be honest - I don't think the conference is going to go well. I think something bad is going to happen".
And she was in sudden agreement, and all the little things started pouring out for each of us.
We watched the news to check for any kind of disasters, and other than the horrible confirmation of John Roberts and a rollback of environmental laws, there wasn't anything out of the terrible standard of things.
Next we sat down for meditation. We lit some candles, and opened up wide. Images of Mary's icon came into my mind quickly, and I offered up a prayer to her asking for protection and guidance. In my mind, I saw the others in pain, especially Jessika. Lorrie's experience was even more dramatic - a loud, serious voice told her twice "DON'T GO!".
We spent several hours mulling over this information, scared and trying to decide what to do. Was all of this our own fears talking, or was God trying to send us a message of warning we needed to take seriously? I looked for ways to try to confirm the information. I tried calling Ben and he wasn't home, but I did reach Roxanne. And she was just as emphatic - don't go. She said it wasn't the flight that was the problem, but that something horrible was going to happen at the conference. I asked for more details, and she said that someone was going to bring some sort of item there, possibly a kind of mystical or magical artifact, that was going to taint and scar everyone there in a very deep way.
I didn't have a tarot deck on hand, but a pendelum dowsing reading gave similar answers, including that Jess was also having a bad feeling about things and that one of the speakers would be bringing this thing.
Put all together, it was too much to ignore. $300 - not important. Safety comes first. Mary even told Lorrie while she was out smoking on the porch, "I said don't go - isn't that enough?"
So after talking with Ellen, who was emphatic that we forget about maybe being rude (and we seriously doubted Jessika would react badly), we had to follow our gut. I called Jessika and left a message with our numbers explaining the situation. She called back Lorrie about an hour ago and said she had been having issues with her family coming up that were really bothering her. Her dad passed away not too long ago, and she was visiting family. Something was really bothering her because Lorrie said she was crying. She said she hoped we were wrong and that we would change our minds, but she understood if we didn't.
I got up an hour ago and confirmed things with Loralea. Now she has a migraine probably induced by all the stress of this.
Each of these warnings, by themselves, would probably not be enough to sway our decision. But when you add them all up together, as a whole their message is incontrovertible. That's meta-analysis - a fundamental principle of parapsychology and synchronicity.
So I called American Airlines a little while ago and cancelled our tickets. Turns out not all is lost - we only lose $100 each, and have a little less than $200 to spend on other flights as long as we use it by next June. Not a problem.
"Details in the Fabric" - May 31, 2009
Not So Quick Questions - April 6, 2009
The Morning Stars - Lords of the 15 - April 9, 2009
Sincerity and Faith in Magic - April 10, 2009
Not So Quick Questions (2) - April 14, 2009
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