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Diaryland
Fear of Routine November 17, 2005 @ 1:07 p.m.
The work load is getting more reasonable now for me at Sunny Hills. I got set up with a new business email and my own profile for the computer. So right now, me and Sade are jazzing it up while I get some work done.
I've been thinking a lot lately about experiences and the emotions attached to them. I think I'm pretty fair in saying that even though I haven't lived very long comparitively, I've already had a lot of different experiences in my life - possibly more so than others my age. Memory is funny in the way it works by association. You won't be able to consciously recall certain things, yet a certain smell, lyric, chord, sight, texture - it brings forgotten yet powerful memories back to the forefront. Scientists say that if we remembered everything simultanously, it would be so chaotic we wouldn't be able to make sense of anything or get anything done. We have to put things out of mind and forget in order to deal with our lives efficiently. And its not really that the memory ever leaves us - its just we forget where we placed it. Maybe the best guarantee against forgetting things is to expose yourself to a variety of sensations and experiences on a regular basis. That way, as many memories as possibly get stimulated.
A few weeks ago, I wrote a little bit about a scary yet very revealing way of looking at your time - not dividing things up into days neatly packaged and split up by dreams, but as one continual day lasting throughout the weeks and months. This job I have now, the other two jobs on the weekend as well; this lifestyle as a whole has got me worried in the way its so routine. Routine in general is a scary thing to me - it always makes me suspicious that I'm not doing something I'm supposed to be doing. And if I don't have too much time on my hands, then the time starts flying by, which is worrisome too. I've worried about time flying for years - too many adults scaring me with stories about how the years fly by and how I have to make the best of my youth. Too much pressure, really.
"Details in the Fabric" - May 31, 2009
Not So Quick Questions - April 6, 2009
The Morning Stars - Lords of the 15 - April 9, 2009
Sincerity and Faith in Magic - April 10, 2009
Not So Quick Questions (2) - April 14, 2009
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